My grandmother use to tell me to make sure that I kept a spare because you never knew when you good thang was going to have a blow out. All my life I lived by this especially when I realized that men couldn't be trusted. I gave a lot of myself to these men but I could never truly give them all of me because I knew that it wouldn't last. Every true relationship that I had, I wanted it to work out. I've been engaged so many times, but after being with a person after so many years they start to show their true colors.
People think that I cant commit or that I am scared of commitment but it's not that at all. The truth is that I can commit but men can't commit themselves to me. The men in my life loved me but they were not in love with me they were in love with my sweet candy apple. They could not love me enough to honestly make me their wife. I was not always their first priority and if I couldn't be their first priority I knew that I could not marry them. My belief for marriage is very strong and I don't believe in divorce. I feel like when two people make that commitment before God anything can be worked out. That's the reason why I haven't been married because I didn't want to marry for all the wrong reasons. When I get married it will be strictly because I love that person unconditionally just for who they are.
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